Emmerdale (ITV1, 7.00pm)
Something tells us that Diane might need more than a vacuum clearer to clean up Mulberry Cottage. It seems that everyone now is now in agreement that Sally is a bad egg - even the Bishop, who reinstates Ashley immediately. One suspects we haven’t seen the last of Sally yet.
This evening’s best soap scene…
Secret Diary of a Call Girl (ITV2, 10.00pm)
WIth actress Billie Piper now back from maternity leave, the delayed third series can begin with tonight’s double-bill. Belle must wear a disguise to attend the launch of her first book, and must learn to deal with criticism after over-hearing comment about her work - the writing that is, not the nookie. In the second helping, the arrival of Belle’s sister complicates the so far successful compartmentalising of her life. When Dr Brooke Magnanti ‘came out’ as the real Belle de Jour, it gave this programme a much meeded publicity boost. We at Chatterbox have always felt that the 30-minute running time has always prevented this series developing any real drama. A short dramatic encounter is perfect for a blog put not so good for a drama series.
A film choice…
American Gigolo (ITV3, 11.00pm)
We’ve seen how Billie struts her stuff, so now let’s have some man’s work. A neat piece of themed ITV scheduling gives us the chance to marvel at this superb 1980 thriller, directed by Taxi Driver writer Paul Schrader, that gave Richard Gere his one truly great role, that of Beverly Hills gigolo Julian Kay who finds himself framed for the murder of one of his clients. Remind yourself of the effortlessly cool title sequence (above) that makes Gere look like the coolest guy you’ve ever seen - and that’s no mean feat. The wonderfully Eighties score is by synthpop pioneer Giorgio Moroder, while CSI creator Jerry Bruckheimer scored his first real hit as a producer with this film.
Well, credit where credit’s due. The BBC’s EastEnders web-only spin-off, E20, has attracted 2million viewers so far, according to reports in the Guardian. The series, launched as part of EastEnders‘ 25th birthday celebrations, is eleven episodes into its run of twelve, and looks good for a recommission. We may have mocked at the beginning but the series has done well, and has given valuable opportunites to young writers - and that’s something the BBC can be proud of.
EastEnders (BBC1, 7.30pm)
Here’s something you don’t see often; Janine doing the right thing - sort of. After being on the end of a verbal dressing down from Ricky, Janine gives DCI Marsden a statement that clears Ian of involvement in Archie’s death and soon finds herself accused of the killing. Poor Janine then tells the hospitalised Pat all about her horrid day, and is promptly told to sling ‘er hook for the umpteenth time.
A warm welcome from Frank…
Shameless (Channel 4, 10.00pm)
The seventh series of Paul Abbott’s sinkhole-estate comedy gets underway tonight with the residents of Chatsworth looking forward to Frank’s (David Threlfall, above) 50th birthday bash. Frank’s not usually prone to bouts of depression but birthday boy isn’t in the party mood and determines to spend the day stewing in his own juice, that is until local librarian Libby (Father Ted star Pauline McLynn) catches his eye.
The truth is out there… I Believe In… UFOs (BBC3, 9.00pm)
If you fancy a good laugh, tune into this. According to this show, every six minutes someone on Earth reports a UFO sighting - mostly in the USA, one assumes. Lad actor Danny Dyer tries his best to discover the ‘truth’ about these extraterrestrial encounters, by visiting one of America’s top UFO hotspots and chatting to astronomer Patrick Moore - one of few voices of reason on display.
Coronation Street (ITV1, 7.30pm)
As we can see above, here’s the latest entry in a long line of unconvincing slaps in soap opera - a category strangely absent from this year’s NTAs. Poor old Becky has received some devastating news but Steve is too busy showing off his new motorbike, and flirting with Kelly, to notice. However, this is all part of a cunning McDonald plan to provoke a reaction from his missus. As you can see, the plan works - eventually.
A familiar face from the past…
Hustle (BBC1, 9.00pm)
After bumping into his property developer father (played by Danny Webb, above), Sean is determined to get even with the man who walked out on him and Emma some 25 years earlier, by recovering the money owed in backdated child support. Despite some initial doubts, the rest of the gang agree to help out but it’s not long before Sean finds himself suffering a conflict of loyalties.
Nurse Hathaway returns…
The Good Wife (Channel 4, 10.00pm)
Since leaving ER in 2000, not a whole lot of Julianna Margulies‘ work has made across the Atlantic. We last recalll seeing her in a few episodes of The Sopranos - as well as ER’s final-season reunion, of course. In this drama series she stars as Alicia Florrick, a wife and mother whose life is turned upside down when her state attorney husband lands himself in jail following a well publicised sex and corruption scandal. Uncomfortable playing the stand-by-your-man wife, Alicia returns to work as a lawyer for the first time in 13 years and quickly finds that the workplace has changed an awful lot during that time.
Some of the stars set to appear in Cracker writer Jimmy McGovern’s recommissioned daytime drama series, Moving On, have been announced. The drama series, filmed in and aroound Liverpool, will feature Life On Mars star John Simm, stage performer Corin Redgrave, Peeping Tom’s Anna Massey, Robert Glenister of Hustle fame, Gerard Kearns of Shameless, and Trainspotting star Ewen Bremner. In addition, The Wire’s Dominic West will direct one of the episodes. The series will be made up of 10 stand-alone episodes, five of which have already been filmed. This reaffirms Chatterbox’s belief that BBC’s daytime offerings are far superior to the competition - that’s what your licence fee gets you, folks. The series is due to broadcast later in the year.
EastEnders (BBC1, 8.00pm)
It appears that Roxy’s growing into the role of landlady at the Vic, and that power maybe going to her head. After Tracey strolls in late for work (have you noticed that people always ’stroll in’ when their late?), Roxy decides to let her go - which brings her into conflict with Peggy. Later, Bianca inquires about holding her wedding reception in the Vic; Peggy says ‘of course’, while Roxy replies ‘it’ll cost you two grand’. Two thousand pound for that dump? She’s ‘aving a larf - as they say round these parts.
This show packs a punch…
First Cut: Ambreen - The Girl Boxer (Channel 4, 7.30pm)
Channel 4’s excellent First Cut strand delivers another fascinating 30-minute slice of British. This edition follows teenager Ambreen Sadiq, Britain’s first Muslim female boxer, as she prepares for an adult bout against rival Bobbi Clarke. Fifteen-year-old Ambreen is hoping to compete in the Olympics but, despite full support from her parents, she’s having difficulty winning over her local community in Keighley, West Yorkshire.
G’day, mate…
Phil Down Under (Channel 4, 8.00pm)
Just as we’d thought Location, Location, Location couldn’t possibly give birth to any more spin-offs, along comes this antipodean adventure. In this four-part series, property expert Phil Spencer travels to Australia to help emigrating British families find their dream homes, starting in Perth. So far, so A Place in the Sun but here’s the show’s USP: Phil also tries his hand at some of the country’s most popular vocations, including the life of a fisherman, being on call with flying doctors and setting up a vineyard. Being a rather jovial sort of fella, Phil just about carries this off.
Coronation Street (ITV1, 8.30pm)
Dev likes to play the articulate, reasoned, renaisance man around town. So, true to form, Dev tries to calm an irate Tyrone and make the lad see sense after Molly moves into the flat above the corner shop. What does Dev get for this humanist act of intervention? A punch in the face from Tyrone, after he puts two and two together and gets five. All of which makes Kev feel even worse than he does already.
Following a familiar pattern…
Material Girl (BBC1, 8.00pm)
This enjoyable piece of fluff reaches new levels of silliness tonight when Ali (Lenora Crichlow) worries that her mistrustful nature will ruin her relationship with Chris. These worries are not enough to stop her spying on Chris and uncovering a startling revelation. Cue all manner of ‘why are you spying on me?’, ‘well, it’s a good job I did!’ style banter.
Meet the people…
Bellamy’s People (BBC2, 10.00pm)
This new comedy, starring Rhys Thomas, Paul Whitehouse and Charlie Higson, is a TV spin-off from Radio 4’s successful spoof radio phone-in show Down the Line - so successful, in fact, that some listeners called in not realising it was a spoof. The plot goes like this; crass phone-in host Gary Bellamy gets the opportunity to present his own TV series, travelling round the country to meet regular callers to his show in the hope of capturing the spirit of Britishness. Just a hint of Little Britain, we suspect.
Emmerdale (ITV1, 7.00pm)
After last night’s hilariously Omen-esque deliberate car crash (nice work by the Emmerdale stunt team, EastEnders could learn a thing or two from these guys), the wonderfully twisted Sally continues her reign of manipulation from her hospital bed by telling Edna that she (Sally, that is, not Edna) has been sleeping with Ashley.
Celebrate the stars of the small screen…
The National Television Awards (ITV1, 7.30pm)
Taking over from Sir Trev, Dermot O’Leary hosts the 15th star-studded ceremony live (or just about) from the O2 Arena in London, where the great and good of the small screen have gathered to hear the results of the annual nationwide poll. Cheeky chappies Ant and Dec lead the pack with three nominations including two for best entertainment programme, Holly Willoughby and Michael McIntyre make the shortlist for the first time in the entertainment presenter category, while the Beeb’s Strictly Come Dancing takes on ITV’s X Factor, Britain’s Got Talent and Dancing on Ice for the best talent show. Those nominated in the drama performance list have a familiar ring to them; Doctor Who’s David Tennant, A Touch of Frost’s David Jason, Shameless actor David Threlfall and Philip Glenister of Ashes to Ashes.
Just in from the States…
Leverage (Bravo, 9.00pm)
It’s not often we flag up a new series on Bravo - that’s because usually there isn’t a great deal worth seeing there. However, this US import may force us to reconsider our prejudices. The series centres on washed-up insurance investigator Nate Ford (the talented but underused Timothy Hutton) who is asked by the head of an aerospace company to recover some crucial airplane blueprints that were stolen by a rival company, but he then gets double-crossed and seeks revenge. It could be described as an American Hustle. Also stars our very own (born in New Zealand actually and now resident in L.A.) Gina Bellman, star of Coupling and who will forever be Dennis Potter’s Blackeyes.
No matter how many times we try, Chatterbox always experiences a slightly uneasy feeling when watching Channel4’s Secret Millionaire. We except that worthwhile people and causes benefit from the donations of these wealthly philanthropists, and that philanthropy has made a telling contribution to society throughout history, but, for us, there is an unpleasant stench of scraps thrown from the master’s table. In last night’s Slumdog Secret Millionaire, wealthy dentist and entrepreneur Seema Sharma left her affluent London lifestyle behind to visit Mumbai, where she found worthwhile causes and then wrote large cheques. Let us be clear, we applaud the generosity of Seema Sharma. Our question is this; why is the camera crew present for this act? To provide entertainment; to raise awareness of the terrible living conditions in the slums of Mumbai; or to flatter the benefactor’s ego? What do you think?
EastEnders (BBC1, 8.00pm)
With Roxy’s name now carved above the door, the Mitchells prepare for the grand opening of the Vic. However, old bag Peggy still can’t except the fact she can no longer scream ‘Get out my pub!’. Later, just as celebrations are getting into full swing, Ian is prevented from enjoying his champagne by the arrival of the old bill, in the form of the utterly humourless DCI Marsden.
On the make…
Hustle (BBC1, 9.00pm)
Albert finds himself the focus of a notorious hardman who is demanding, with menaces, £500,000 by the end of the week. Rallying round their chum, the team hopes to raise the cash by targeting a would-be playboy (Fast Show star Simon Day) who is in possession of a gold tiger worth a tidy amount of money. As we all know, a pretty girl is usually the best way to part a man from his money - so the lovely Emma is dispatched to use her feminine wiles to persuade their mark to relinquish his golden statue. Former Doctor WhoColin Baker pops up too.
Fancy a takeaway?
Gordon’s Great Escape (Channel 4, 9.00pm)
As part of Channel 4’s Indian Winter season, everyone’s favourite foul-mouthed chef Gordon Ramsay goes to great lengths to pick up the pefect curry. His culinary journey across India, where he hopes to learn how to authentically prepare the country’s signature dishes, begins on an express train where he cooks for the passengers in the cramped, and rather warm, pantry car. The series continues over the next two evenings.
